fashion forward and other bologna

Greetings from the May that feels like mid-December.

 I have some Melasma to get cracking on so I would appreciate if his highness, the sun, would show his handsome face sometime very soon. 

This weekend was filled with excitement and festivities:

I purchased a pair of shoes from Sears. They might be borderline orthotic and ugly but by golly they sure are comfy.

I inhaled grocery store sushi twice...once with a healthy side of Mcdonalds. (low brow? probably but it is my new favorite thing on planet earth)

I dealt with this skinny cup of joy:

Basically 'my baby is teething' is just a fat euphemism for 'I have a really bad baby on my hands'. I hope this ends soon because my patience and sleep deprivation tolerance are both seriously waning. I'm thisclose to trading her in for a potty trained 6 year old. 

I tried really hard to convince myself that the lady chain smoking in our neighbor's driveway was not pregnant but was merely growing a large benign stomach cyst. 

I also predictably altered some pantalones. I'm sure you've noticed that I tend to be pretty fashion forward when it comes to my attire. I hop on any and all trend trains and always forgo comfort for style whenst given the choice. 

Enter the ultra flared jean trend:

I know the hot trend has been out of the oven for quite some time and is losing steam but I didn't let that stop me from trying to morph a pair of old trouser jeans into a pair of semi-ultra flares. . .

caveman stance + creepy stare

if it looks like I'm fake smiling and that my jeans aren't quite tailored to perfection...its because I am and they are not. 

I had just waged a very serious war on my bleeping sewing machine after it refused to cooperate by way of many a bent needle. 

(it is now doing serious time at a repair center)

Anyway...so there they are..paired with my orthotics. 

Do I love them? 

no.

Do they look even remotely close to the real hot deal?
definitely no.

 but
do I feel like a better person that contributes just a little more to humanity while I'm wearing them?

absolutely.

and now I'm off to literally chuck my car keys deep into the bowels of Julia's Diaper Genie so that I don't make a third run for some high class sushi. 

hasta la later,

g-r-a-c-e