Camp Patton: maternity shirt fix and more

When I was pregnant with Julia I ordered a few maternity tops online similar to this one:

via

(minus the attached mini skirt)

and this:

via

thinking they would be oh so cute....dropped waist y todo....

no. no. and no.

not cute.

very unflattering.

the dropped elastic waist always seem to ride up and give a little maternity pants panel show or just sit and highlight the hippiest part of za bod...

I was particularly disappointed about this shirt as I loved the floral pattern and lightweight material:

but the fit was just too fugly for me

so...I decided to take matters into my own swollen hands and rip out the elastic living in the hem, rehem, and relocate the elastic to a new empire waist home:

giving me a slightly less unflattering product:

to the left...discovering and staring at something I will show you momentarily

to the right...maybe I overestimated how low the elastic needed to go...as proven by the upper bubbling...whatev

I highly doubt this will last me the full nine months as it just isn't long enough for the likes of the growing tum but....I would venture to say that this might make a trip out of the closet and into the wild of the public...

we'll see.

onward

um...anyone care to take a gander at what on God's green earth this fowlness might be?

I don't think it's Lucy vom as we had an orange variety in the front yard when we first moved in.

Is it mold?

Have we struck natural resource gold in our very own suburban yard?

Foamy cat urine?

A rare breed of mushroom?

I don't have a hazmat suit and would prefer not to touch it in my delicate condition but I would like to identify it before I let Julia and Lucy loose on all fours near the nasty.

and get excited....