Camp Patton: 34 weeks

21 September 2011

Well 34 weeks and one day

(which is important to note at this point in pregnancy of course)

You know when you just feel

hugehugehugehuge

and can't stop the

heartburnheartburnheartburnheart

or the chronic

burnbackachebackachebackachebackache

or the nagging

youshouldsleepnocleannosleepnocleannosleep

yes, a fancy mix of that this week

and my spandex sleep/sweat/food shop uniform
paging a wannabe Melanie Chisholm
(you catch that bad pun? four points for you)

this little emerald dropped in my inbox yesterday:

gathering-nuts-for-the-winter look
oh goodie.

I vacillate hourly between wanting the baby to come earlyish (but safely obvioulsy) so that I can resume sleeping comfortably and wanting the baby to come late so that I can continue sleeping at all. {oh...God's perfect design...making these last few (several?) weeks of pregnancy just unbearable enough that a wrinkly little sleepvacuum sounds light years better than blimpville...but three nights into no sleep...blimpville sounds heavenly.

win/win I suppose.}

Also...I would like Julia to start walking and communicating more than her machine gun exclamatory LOUD whispers of,

"hat hat hat hat hat!!!"
(translashe: hot! even if it's an ice cube...still hat)

(this 8 second clip has it all: mullet and shy di)

also
...things to not say to a pregnant lady (or to me when I am pregnant)

"you've grown!!!"

what do you mean? my face is fat? I know. go away now please.

"how much weight have you gained?"

um. how much money is in your bank account?

yes. equally personal.

"well...I think you are even larger than when I saw you earlier today."

oh. yes. and I know you were way skinner in high school but would never actually say that to your face...or maybe I just did.

don't worry. I have susie and her sunshine scheduled to make an appearance next week and I promise to be a more pleasant preg.

really.

16 comments:

JDSeptember 21, 2011 at 5:11 PM
"get cheek-slimming make up tips" helpful. oh so helpful, I'm sure.

Hat-hat! funny! Rose thinks everything is hot too. She even cools off her ice cream which has melted by the time she starts eating it.
UnknownSeptember 21, 2011 at 5:26 PM
Hahaha! That email! Seriously??

And also, you are TINY.
TiffanySeptember 21, 2011 at 5:46 PM
Oh my goodness, I always gained like a million pounds when I was pregnant and I HATED being asked that question! Especially when it was asked by a teeny tiny little person who only gained like 2 pounds the whole time she was pregnant. lol

But 34 weeks! Yay!! Not too much longer at all. Despite your discomfort, I still say you're looking mighty cute!
BridgetSeptember 21, 2011 at 5:58 PM
How in the world do you look so flippin' adorable at 34 weeks?!

That nutty email is hilarious though! That is so very me when prego... chipmunk cheeks and chloasma, super duper fun! :P

Julia is so funny! Tagg still does that too, saying "hot" for anything that is really hot or really cold.
MarjorieSeptember 21, 2011 at 8:09 PM
I was thinking the same thing, do I want the baby early so I can sleep with going to the bathroom every hour or do I want to trade that for late night dining? You look good as always :)
BiblioMOMiaSeptember 21, 2011 at 8:22 PM
Right now, The Pup just runs around the house saying "more more more more more shoes shoes." Wild boy.

People say stupid horrible things to pregnant women. Please say some of your responses for real...and document them for us to laugh at!
UnknownSeptember 21, 2011 at 8:43 PM
You look friggin fantastic...I'm only in my 19th week and I'm definitely as big as you. But I wasn't blessed with your tiny frame. I can bet you a million dollars that you do not look as big as you feel! Those last few weeks are torture though with pretty much every single symptom of pregnancy magnified by a million, minus the elusive glow, plus extra back pain. Also, I didn't know what you looked like before you were pregnant so when your face de-puffs, it's going to be like one of those fantastic before/after photos and I'm going to be awed by your slim face ;)
Kayla MoncurSeptember 21, 2011 at 10:47 PM
I happen to think you do not look 34 weeks preg. 29 TOPS. And I see no chipmunking going on. You are glowy and radiant as per usual.

Kayla
Freckles in April
ann.September 22, 2011 at 9:31 AM
i love the video of j!!!! she's so cute!!!
Heidi LassilaSeptember 22, 2011 at 9:56 AM
Aaah, if I had a friend as funny as you I wouldn't even care if she was a crabby preggo! Okay, maybe a little, I mean, to sympathize you know...
Matt and Jen McEvoySeptember 22, 2011 at 10:02 AM
Lil J's video is so cute! My girlie's favorite word is "Hi" she loves to say it in as many ways as possible, long, short, fast, slow, super loud, super quiet, it's hilarious. But if we tell her to say "bye" she just waves, haha! And you are tiny! There is no way you are bigger than me!
Fleur De MoiSeptember 22, 2011 at 10:41 AM
I think you look amazingly adorable. You really don't look 34 weeks at all!
Davis and LauraSeptember 22, 2011 at 1:01 PM
for 34 weeks you look pretty much amazing. i look like that at 6 months....way to go! :) excited to meet the new little baby!
AnaSeptember 22, 2011 at 2:14 PM
Um, are you serious Grace?!?! You DO NOT look 34 weeks, that is what I looked like at 8 weeks the second time around I think... I will be coming to you for tips on how to look like this during pregnancy, way to go!!
in morse codeSeptember 22, 2011 at 3:13 PM
You look great for 34 weeks! good luck with the rest of the weeks...seriously!
UnknownSeptember 24, 2011 at 1:13 PM
You look fabulous! I'm 34 weeks as well and I feel like a whale. I don't know that I will ever understand why people feel the need to comment about pregnant women... nothing good ever comes from it! I empathize with your entire post: Sleeplessness, the urge to clean... EVERYTHING, and the back-and-forth debate on the baby coming early or late (pretty sure I change my mind by the minute).