Simon Says

on a scale of 1-5 with Sebastian trucking and Theo squealing and Julia cooing and Phoebe squawking and the laundry begging to be put away the volume level up in here was at a solid 10. and on a scale of 1-asleep Simon was pretty much dead.

While looking at Pinterest for the first time Simon said, "WHAT is this?!"

After changing Sebastian's diaper and commenting on my, "wear it till it's really dirty" policy ... Simon said, "so he's been wearing the same pants for the past 15 changes."

Answering Julia's call for, "HALP" in the bathroom, Simon said, "okay, Theo - are you ready to go on a safari of smells? ... let's go."

While wiping Theo's super runny nose a few weeks ago Simon noted, "well, he's fertile."

Before he left for his first interview in Birmingham, Simon asked, "how offended would you be if I got a professional haircut before my interviews? It's just that ear tufts aren't my best look."

In the middle of one of Julia's epic 99 million rapid fire question sessions Simon asked, "do you think you could turn your personality down to 50% for a few minutes?"

After studying Phoebe for a few minutes, Simon said, "I'd say she looks more like Jay-Z than anyone else."

And finally ... after a fun night of co-sleeping with both Grace and Phoebe in our glorified twin bed, Simon complained, "at one point I had fewer than six inches to call my own so I had to turn on my side and balance delicately on my left love handle."