Well, folks - the time had come.
Enough was enough was enough.
Innocuous illness (round one of the stomach flu, coughs, round two of the stomach bug, more coughs, round three of the stomach flu, pesky colds, and then round mothereffing FOUR of the stomach flu ... etc) kept the big kids out of preschool for more days than they attended in February, I had started to visualize myself scaling the living room walls in search of a secret exit at certain points in the day, and Sebastian finally completed his 2000th sprint-lap around the basement. It was time to pull out the emergency white flag last Wednesday, find mismatched socks for everyone, and text Simon at work that we would be paying handsomely that evening so that the kids might get ALL of their wiggles out at one of these indoor monstrosities.
He did not argue because he not dumb.
I knew the odds of catching another illness (and some of us did) or ten just as everyone was finally healthy was high but ... caution to the germ-infested inside air! I didn't care.
Just rolllllll all over the infected inflated fun, kids.
Phoebe stayed contained in the free play area for kids under two for about two seconds ...
... while the child with unlimited access to the not-free area wouldn't leave.
Of course!
Theo found her rebellious behavior especially frustrating and kept grabbing her by the back of the diaper to try to heave her back into captivity. But nope! So he used all six of his syllables to convince me to help him get her into his wagon ...
... that'll SHOW HER.
Blame it on the near fatal effects of the winter cabin fever that would not break or my dulled sense of pathetic parenting humor but I got a fat kick out of the 1/2 mile he managed to walk her.
Phoebe Unflappable Patton.
She was utterly unfazed by their sojourn - unlike her cellular phone video recording happy mom.
Anyway, the weather gods have been oh so kind and merciful the past few days so my terrible, horrible, no good and VERY BAD plans to hit up Chuck E. Cheese when we all hit another low are on hold for now. And hopefully forever.
We'll see.
We shall see.
Enough was enough was enough.
Innocuous illness (round one of the stomach flu, coughs, round two of the stomach bug, more coughs, round three of the stomach flu, pesky colds, and then round mothereffing FOUR of the stomach flu ... etc) kept the big kids out of preschool for more days than they attended in February, I had started to visualize myself scaling the living room walls in search of a secret exit at certain points in the day, and Sebastian finally completed his 2000th sprint-lap around the basement. It was time to pull out the emergency white flag last Wednesday, find mismatched socks for everyone, and text Simon at work that we would be paying handsomely that evening so that the kids might get ALL of their wiggles out at one of these indoor monstrosities.
He did not argue because he not dumb.
I knew the odds of catching another illness (and some of us did) or ten just as everyone was finally healthy was high but ... caution to the germ-infested inside air! I didn't care.
Just rolllllll all over the infected inflated fun, kids.
... while the child with unlimited access to the not-free area wouldn't leave.
Of course!
Theo found her rebellious behavior especially frustrating and kept grabbing her by the back of the diaper to try to heave her back into captivity. But nope! So he used all six of his syllables to convince me to help him get her into his wagon ...
... that'll SHOW HER.
Blame it on the near fatal effects of the winter cabin fever that would not break or my dulled sense of pathetic parenting humor but I got a fat kick out of the 1/2 mile he managed to walk her.
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Phoebe Unflappable Patton.
She was utterly unfazed by their sojourn - unlike her cellular phone video recording happy mom.
Anyway, the weather gods have been oh so kind and merciful the past few days so my terrible, horrible, no good and VERY BAD plans to hit up Chuck E. Cheese when we all hit another low are on hold for now. And hopefully forever.
We'll see.
We shall see.
Pheobe's face! So funny. Just chillin'.
ReplyDeleteThat video was hilarious!
ReplyDeleteThat video is nothing short of amazing....LOVE it! My oldest pushes my youngest around in her doll stroller and she is WAY too big for it but it's hilarious and I can never stop laughing, it will break soon enough! Yay for warmer weather, I just came back from TX and it was only 50 while I was there but I did manage to bring that 50 degree weather back to WI and it's glorious! And I had to laugh at your "just roll all over the infected inflated fun, kids" because those are my feelings exactly but my insanity takes over and I just let them roll!
ReplyDeleteI am dead at that video. Dead with laughter.
ReplyDeleteThe ROLLOUT just put it over the top. PERFECt
ReplyDeleteSo I just commented and it disappeared, apologies if you get all of the spam. That video is so cute and I lovethat Pheobe seems resigned to her doom. Her face in that photo!! "Bitch please! Are you going to condone this behaviour?!"
ReplyDeleteSoundtrack is perfect.
ReplyDeleteOMG Phoebe's face...perfection 😂
ReplyDeleteOh the hilarity! And yes, thank GOD for the weather change!
ReplyDeleteThank you for the ambiance music, it truly made my day. How could I ever have forgotten that song?
ReplyDeleteI watched that video three times and laughed every time. Her ambivalence and his determination are the absolute best! Plus Roll Out was the perfect song.
ReplyDeleteLucy would be loosing her shiz if her brothers tried to do that to her! Love it. And good choice on the muzak - really rocking out Theo's gait!
ReplyDeleteOh my GOSH I am dying over that video. Your song choice is on. point. I can't stop laughing.
ReplyDeleteLol I love how chill she is. Like, yeah what of it I be riding in a mini wagon fools! PS I read on Bloglovin and can see the videos right in the page!
ReplyDeleteYou have no idea how much I wish we had a play center like that around us! We would have been living there every weekend this winter!
ReplyDeleteAlthough I must say I'm particularly disturbed by the noticeable bulge in the superhero's shorts... do they really have to make him anatomically accurate for a children's slide?
Pheobe's all like, "driving miss daisy. totally normal thang." LOVE HER.
ReplyDeleteI normally don't play videos (don't know why really), but I am so glad I did this time, it just enhanced the enjoyment of your moment by a million times and it was already pretty cute. How did you even find the music?? Ha ha ha...still laughing
ReplyDeleteI've been meaning to take my toddler to the local TotPlex, but haven't braved it so far this winter due to flu epidemic (+newborn! Mr Toddler couldn't visit me in the hospital due to flu restrictions!) and the spate of roofs collapsing in my town (I live in New England, blerg). But our weather is turning around at last, so we'll probably go there soon since the playground will probably be under snow until July... 😁
ReplyDeleteChuck E. Cheese is definitely the 7th level of parenting you-know-where. I beg you - don't do it..! :)
ReplyDeleteReader here but don't usually comment. :)
ReplyDeleteOMG, that video + that music, highlight of my day. HAHAHA Loved it. Thank you for the entertainment. Adorable kids, adorable family; I don't know how you do it and so 'grace-fully'. Ha, punny, I bet you've never heard that one before. ;) I'm on #2 and feel so behind, you are an inspiration!! :)
Just stop it with that video. I almost died. :'-D
ReplyDeleteI completely understand your need to get out of the house for both of you & your kid's sanity! I just wrote a post about saving your sanity during the winter months. Feel free to check it out.
ReplyDelete